I was beyond excited about the owner of the gym and coach of the class welcoming my husband and myself into your facility, so that I could improve my mat game. I love working with new coaches- to have exposure to different techniques, exercises and insights - it has helped me to grow into the black belt that I am today. You should be able to appreciate this, as martial artists yourselves.
As I got prepared for the very exciting practice my husband explained that we were leaving instead. On the way to a different gym it was explained to me that we left because two paying customers were uncomfortable taking a class alongside a woman.
I wanted to let you know that had I been aware as to why we were leaving, I would not have left. My husband is a very kind, respectful man who did not want to cause an issue. I am not him. Had I known that you were whining about being in the room with a woman I would have done exactly what I have done 100s of times before around idiots like you. Proven your insecurities wrong.
I would have trained right next to you. Ensuring that I worked 15 times harder. I would have made sure that my techniques were being executed perfectly, that my speed was increasing with each move, and that my focus was 110% on getting better. I would have crushed any partner I worked with, all while being extremely friendly, respectful, and supportive of their growth. I would have epitomized what martial arts and athletic partnership is all about- making yourself and your training partners better than we were when we walked in the door.
I would have fully respected your antiquated hatred for females and would have avoided touching you. I would have ensured that you were aware that a female being in the room WOULD NOT ruin your training. I would have made you question your thinking. I would have made you look my way and wonder why my skills are so good and why everyone enjoys working with me.
You are not a stranger. I have seen idiots like you my entire life. I have tried to validate an understanding for your sexism- I've heard all the excuses. It's fear of doing worse than a girl. It's not a woman's place. It's not a lady-like sport. Its a religious view or an ideology passed down from your dad. Its out of respect for women so that you don't hurt us. It is a validation of your manliness.
I get it.
Its a lot of excuses...and bottom line is you are uncomfortable.
But I am writing this open letter to let you know- TOUGH SHIT. Life is full of discomfort. Get over it. Get over yourself.
My self improvement literally does not impact you. Focus more on yourself and less on whether a chick is bench pressing next to you.
You are lucky that my husband didn't explain why we had to leave.
Because had I known about your sexism, I would have stayed, and you may have left practice pondering how you survived with a female near by.
Had I stayed, your insecurities may have come into question.
Your mind may have been changed.
The girl who beat up every wrestler who ever avoided being her partner,
The women who lifts more than the assholes who don't want her on the sqaut rack,
The lady who throw judo players that wonder why women are there,
The female who sprints faster than the guys who hate being in the same heat as her,
The chick who armbars the bjj players who don't want a girl partner,
The feminist who works harder because of assholes like you
PS- I got in one of the best training sessions of the month when I left your sexist filled gym. Thanks Karma. Hope you enjoyed your sausage fest.
***To clarify: the gym owner and coach apparently still wanted us to stay despite these turds. Apparently they thought it was ridiculous. This incident was no reflection of the gym itself. Literally just two jackasses...****
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Believer that everyone is special.