My husband and I have had three main goals for our judo adventure around the world: 

1. Learn as much as possible
2. Explore a lot
3. Do not get hurt

On Monday I was beyond excited to be training at a top university in Japan.  The class was everything that I had hoped it to be- filled with lots of talented women, focused on technique, personalized, and filled with lots of live fighting.  It was one of my favorite practices of the trip  thus far.  Until awkward positioning and a rough follow through ended in a bad fall and a crunching sound.  I knew immediately that I had broken our 3rd rule as shooting pain erupted through my body.  
Any athlete knows the agony of having an injury.  All you want to do is get back at your sport- the aching is a reminder of what you are unable to do.  It plagues your mind.  Its similar to when you are a committed employee and you get sick- that presentation, report, and lingering to-do list haunts you as you are stuck in bed to mend.  
As I was taken to the university doctor for evaluation all I could do was feel sorry for myself.  Thinking of the practices I will miss.  The opportunities for improvements lost.  The worry about how long this will put me out.   The self pity machine ran heavy as the doctor twisted, poked, and prodded to determine the source and magnitude of the injury.  As an athlete this sense of anger towards being injured is natural - it comes with a deep sense of sadness and helplessness because you are being held back from what you need to do.

But I am older for an athlete.
I am not stubborn and I refuse to run back to the gym prior to healing.
I know injuries and illness are a part of life.
And I am not someone who allows for much sulking.  

Here's my go to "how to survive an injury/illness" guide:

I distinctly remember at recess racing to be the first of the kids at the swings so that I had maximum air time.  There was magic in the swing set that no other playground equipment had.  As you hurdle yourself off the ground and propel yourself upwards, the air blowing in your face you are immediately desiring to fly higher.  To see more of the sky.  To feel weightless and carefree.  
Soaring upwards you feel light.  
Untouchable.  
Like a bird floating through life.  
Disconnected from all the madness, people, problems, and insanity that lies below you at ground floor. You soar towards the heavens, the blue skies opening up with beauty and peace.
But much like life anytime you soar upwards you immediately are catapulted back down.  You are only gifted the reward of that serene flotation if you work for it.  If you pump your legs and thrust your hips hard enough to catapult yourself back up into the wide open. 

As a child the swings were my absolute favorite.  And then middle school happened and recess wasn't a thing.  Then high school, college, and 'real life' happened and I forgot about swings.  My love for them never died - just remembering them- and making time for them did.

Yesterday I walked by a park (as one often does) and for whatever reason I made a mad dash for the swings.  It was my first time on them in years.  It was still as magical as when I was a child!  Except I feel like I appreciated the fresh air, shining sun, trees above, laughing children below, and rush of lightness more yesterday than ever.  
Maybe I found some symbolism in swinging that I never saw as a child.  That the best things in life, you have to work for...and the more work you put in, the higher your soar.  
Maybe I appreciated the moment with nature more.  I am recently finding a sense of love for laying at the beach at night to stare at the overwhelming intensity of the stars and my role in the universe.  I am making efforts to look up at the trees instead of down at my phone as I wander the streets.  I am loving breathing in freshly cut grass as I partake in runs.  Being in the air gives you a connection with nature unlike others- a birds eye view if you will.  Like most interactions with nature you leave with a sense of your smallness in the world and a deep sense of connection with what really matters.  

Today I walked by another park...and went on the swings again.
I urge you, next time you see a swing set - embrace the inner child that never stopped loving the rush of floating, the connection with nature, the lesson that your hard work will make you soar, the feeling of escape from all the everyday-ness below, a sense of freedom, and most importantly a reason to smile and laugh.

Run like its recess and you need to be one of the first kids there so you have a spot.
Get on a swing.
Bring yourself a reminder of what matters.

Some things that I didn't expect was the challenge of learning how to fill my days.  A few weeks in, I felt guilty for not "doing more" - so I was fervently looking online for "work from home work" and signing up for tons of classes.  But I woke up feeling stressed and then was losing sleep, and suddenly I realized there was no need.
I have since stepped back and instead am filling my time with whatever I find fulfilling.

To my surprise this has meant morning yoga practice, reading ALOT, exploring the top rated places to see in each city we visit (never thought I'd enjoy a soccer stadium...but it was surreal), day dreaming about potential future jobs/paths, writing, contacting loved ones at home, learning a language (slowly), watching movies before bed, playing MAGIC (thanks hasbro), joking with the hubby, learning to cook quick/easy/cheap, taking an online class, and of course lots of training!  Not having the demand of working on my plate it's been incredible remembering what it is I actually enjoy doing.  Many are the same things I loved as a kid...but just forgot about as 'life' took over.

When is the last time you acted like a kid- and just spent the day filled with activities that made you smile? No "must-do" lists...'Obligations" ignored...but just spending the day doing what makes you happy in life?
If you have not done so recently - DO IT.  
You only live once.  Fill your days with things that make YOU happiest.  
Spend time learning what those things are. 
Spend time remembering what they are.

Two months in and here are my big takeaways:

• Follow your gut
• If its scary, its likely worth the risk.
• Fill your day as if you were a child- with things you love.  Relearn what that is.
• When you travel, be sure to explore- get lost and do research about what makes that land culturally special so you get the most out of it.
• Cultures may change...but people everywhere are willing to help and share kindness.
• Be thankful to those who help your dreams happen.  They are gifts.

I can't wait to see what these next 4 months have in store for us!
What do they have in store for you?  Hopefully some scary and happiness filled days....

I would advise listening to it while in the car, arm trailing out the window taking in the cool breeze, on repeat so you can let the beat move your body....by listen #3 you will be singing along even if you don't know any arabic.  i was.

Being 6 weeks into this job-free, world-tour, judo-training venture I have had a ton of time to reflect.  Here are a few realizations that I have made thus far:

1. SET ASIDE YOU TIME DAILY.  As much as I respect going with the flow, I am a person that NEEDS some goals and structure to my days.  So even if its waking 2 hours earlier than others to commit myself to Me time- for goal setting, reflection, yoga, reading, and writing.  Without any time set aside during my day to specifically spend some time with myself- I just drag along, day in and out, falling into a lazy routine.   I feel like this is a huge lesson.  Its easy to fall into leisure.  Its hard to force yourself to make you time.  To feel good at the end of the day though, this commitment to self is necessary.
2. ALWAYS STRETCH YOURSELF.  I love to learn.  During down time I have taken an online course, started to learn french, read 2 books, have committed to 30 days of yoga, researched the places I visit, and am constantly learning at the dojo.  There is so much information out there and it is impossible to ever be an expert in everything - but if something interests you - ask questions and commit yourself to learning more about it.  You will feel refreshed and enlightened by your constant growth.
3. BE TRUE TO YOUR FUTURE SELF.   Its been strange not working. It's easy to fall into immediately looking for work and accepting whatever is available (aka continuing to do what you have done in the past).  Its kind of like getting over a bad breakup - so easy to fall back into where you were instead of looking for what will be best for you ultimately.  I want to fill my future with things I fully love and to do that I need to accept this time of ME.  I have been trying to embrace the freedom of not working- focusing heavily on what I care about, what makes me happy, and spending time learning more about myself - expecting this will lead me where I need to be next.  I think this advice is critical to anyone who feels stuck at work and knows in their heart that they need to make a change.  Not knowing what is next is OK...embrace the scary unknown and be true to yourself.  You will end up where you need to be. 

The key take-away: Take some time for YOU.  Make some time for YOU.
You matter.